We all want to connect and be involved with our children. Children of involved parents generally feel more confident, assured and have a higher level of self-esteem. They excel in school and do well in extracurricular activities and with their hobbies.
But is there such a thing as too much involvement? It’s imperative when you’re becoming involved with your school-aged child’s activities and academics that you recognize the line of what being too involved can be.
Remember, you’re becoming involved in your child’s life. You mustn’t intrude too much upon it. Children need their space and privacy and they need to be able to develop their skills, talents, and abilities. In our eagerness to help our children succeed, it’s tempting to step in and start doing things for them because you feel they are doing it incorrectly or inadequately. But remember, you have to learn too, and this is their chance to learn on their own.
Be there to encourage and support your child, and offer praise for a job well done. But also remember to step back and allow your child to learn from their own mistakes and develop their way of doing things. We all know from our own life experiences that there’s always more than just one way to do something, and just because your child is doing it differently than you would, doesn’t make it wrong. Who knows, it could present a terrific opportunity for you to learn from your child as well.
In addition, try not to become too overbearing or nosy when it comes to their social life. Be available for them should they need to talk and encourage them to share their troubles with you and help them sort through a problem. But if they say they don’t want to talk about it or they just need some time to figure things out for themselves, respect that needs by letting them know you’re available whenever they need you. This is an important part of growing up, and allowing a child to figure his way through things is an integral part of that process.
